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  • Lawn Service

    Dear Friend:

    This letter is being sent to you because we know you are critically interested in your front lawn. The spring season will soon be upon us. This is a Fertilize Your Lawn Club and it will not cost you a cent to join. Upon receipt of this letter, go to the address at the top of the list and shit on their front lawn. You will not be the only one there, so do not feel embarrassed.

    Remove the name at the top of the list and add your name to the bottom, then make five copies of this letter and send them to five of your friends who appreciate good lawns. You will not get any cash or checks, but within one week, if the chain is not broken, there will be 9,915 people shitting on your front lawn.Your reward will come later on this summer season when you have the greenest lawn in your neighborhood.

    Mrs. Lucy Bowels
    29 Bedpan Court

    Mrs. Julie Crapp
    236 Hershey Squirts Lane

    Mr. Harry Butt
    1422 Enema Drive

    Mr. Smelly B. Hind
    276 Diarrhea Way

    Mrs. G. Howie Farts
    69 Rectum Road

    Mr. Bigger Movements
    724 Runny Loose Lane

    P.S. If you are constipated, please pass this along to your neighbor. DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN! One man didn't give a shit and lost his entire lawn.
    :tv:

  • #2
    Ex-Lax anyone?

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