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I knew when I saw her at the used car lot down by 494 & Concord, I had to have her. Any car with parking lights damn near as big as the headlights has to draw attention. Ugly assed vent windows and a homely roofline caused me to raise my eyebrow.
I walked closer to peek in at the interior only to find a seat that looked like mice had burroughed in and made their home. Mouse turds all over the floor confirmed my suspicions. As I sat in the driver's seat, I noticed the three-on-the-tree shifter and started slowly going through the gears pretending I was a kid again in my friend's dad's Bitchcayne, which had the same shifter. I had flashbacks of trying to full throttle shift that Bitchcayne and missing 2nd gear each and every time. A motion similar to the Berenguer Boogie.
The smell of gear lube and skunk air freshner further reminded me of those good ol' days. I got a little carried away shifting the column and dropped my cell phone on the floor and it slid under the seat. As I looked under the seat, I not only found my phone, I found a Burger King wrapper and then one from McDonalds. I also noticed a couple empty Trojan wrappers.
OK...that's it! I bought her! I can now enjoy the 6 cylinder--1 barrel carbed--three on the treee--ugly as sin--beast all by myself. First thing tomorrow, I'm gonna go up to Fleet Farm and buy those blue Dickie coveralls so I can drive her the way she was meant to be driven.
Thanks Mark for stocking the usual "piece of crap" cars you are so famous for!!!!!
stories by baster ®
I walked closer to peek in at the interior only to find a seat that looked like mice had burroughed in and made their home. Mouse turds all over the floor confirmed my suspicions. As I sat in the driver's seat, I noticed the three-on-the-tree shifter and started slowly going through the gears pretending I was a kid again in my friend's dad's Bitchcayne, which had the same shifter. I had flashbacks of trying to full throttle shift that Bitchcayne and missing 2nd gear each and every time. A motion similar to the Berenguer Boogie.
The smell of gear lube and skunk air freshner further reminded me of those good ol' days. I got a little carried away shifting the column and dropped my cell phone on the floor and it slid under the seat. As I looked under the seat, I not only found my phone, I found a Burger King wrapper and then one from McDonalds. I also noticed a couple empty Trojan wrappers.
OK...that's it! I bought her! I can now enjoy the 6 cylinder--1 barrel carbed--three on the treee--ugly as sin--beast all by myself. First thing tomorrow, I'm gonna go up to Fleet Farm and buy those blue Dickie coveralls so I can drive her the way she was meant to be driven.
Thanks Mark for stocking the usual "piece of crap" cars you are so famous for!!!!!
stories by baster ®
really...
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