Tweet
Why are hemorrhoids called “hemorrhoids” instead of “asteroids”?
If it’s tourist season, why can’t we shoot them?
If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Would a part-time bandleader be considered a semi-conductor?
Can someone be a closet claustrophobic?
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear earmuffs?
If you ate pasta and antipasta at the same time, would you still be hungry?
How do you know when you’re out of invisible ink?
If the folks at the psychic hotlines were really psychic, wouldn’t they call you first?
If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made from?
Can you fart and burp at the same time?
When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
Which way does a slant 6 slant?
Is a Cruise-O-Matic transmission only for cruising?
Is there anything silly about a solenoid?
If power goes to the left rear tire, why does the right rear spin?
If a water spins clockwise when it drains in the northern hemisphere, and water spins counterclockwise when it drains in the southern hemisphere...which way does it spin at the equator?
If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see?
What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?
Why do they call it 2% milk, if its 2% fat, not milk?
Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
Do birds pee?
If you are born on February 29 of a leap year, when is your birthday?
When a male is elected president and his wife is called the First Lady. What would a lady's husband be called if she were elected president?
Can dogs have dog days?
Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when we describe something being crap?
Why do they call the clock where you punch your time card a "time" clock? Aren't all clocks "time" clocks?
Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?
Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?
Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
Why do radio operators say "niner" instead of just "nine"?
Do dumped farmers get John Deere letters?
Do pigs pull ham strings?
On a telephone, why does ABC start on the number 2 and not 1?
Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?
Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?
Why do people, such as S.W.A.T or Seals wear the bulletproof vests where you can see them? Wouldn’t people aim for their head or crotch?
How come, in the Mini Wheat’s commercials, Sweets has a Brooklyn accent and Wheat’s has an English accent? They're attached at the back, wouldn't they have been raised in the same place?
Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza?
If our planet is inhabited with creatures made by God...is it possible that there's another planet inhabited with creatures made by the Devil?
If a table is propped up can it be propped down?
If shampoo comes in so many colors, why is the lather on your head always white?
Is an alcoholic just a drunk that's scared of a hangover?
Seeing as cupid is so good at matchmaking, does he have a girlfriend?
If the police see some one committing a crime but are on there way to investigate a crime do they stop or go to the one they were on their way to?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn't they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand?
If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church?
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
If the weather man says "it's a 50% chance of rain" does that mean he has no idea if its going to rain or not?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On our desk we have work stations. GO FIGURE!
If it’s tourist season, why can’t we shoot them?
If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Would a part-time bandleader be considered a semi-conductor?
Can someone be a closet claustrophobic?
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear earmuffs?
If you ate pasta and antipasta at the same time, would you still be hungry?
How do you know when you’re out of invisible ink?
If the folks at the psychic hotlines were really psychic, wouldn’t they call you first?
If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made from?
Can you fart and burp at the same time?
When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
Which way does a slant 6 slant?
Is a Cruise-O-Matic transmission only for cruising?
Is there anything silly about a solenoid?
If power goes to the left rear tire, why does the right rear spin?
If a water spins clockwise when it drains in the northern hemisphere, and water spins counterclockwise when it drains in the southern hemisphere...which way does it spin at the equator?
If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see?
What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?
Why do they call it 2% milk, if its 2% fat, not milk?
Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
Do birds pee?
If you are born on February 29 of a leap year, when is your birthday?
When a male is elected president and his wife is called the First Lady. What would a lady's husband be called if she were elected president?
Can dogs have dog days?
Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when we describe something being crap?
Why do they call the clock where you punch your time card a "time" clock? Aren't all clocks "time" clocks?
Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?
Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?
Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
Why do radio operators say "niner" instead of just "nine"?
Do dumped farmers get John Deere letters?
Do pigs pull ham strings?
On a telephone, why does ABC start on the number 2 and not 1?
Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?
Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?
Why do people, such as S.W.A.T or Seals wear the bulletproof vests where you can see them? Wouldn’t people aim for their head or crotch?
How come, in the Mini Wheat’s commercials, Sweets has a Brooklyn accent and Wheat’s has an English accent? They're attached at the back, wouldn't they have been raised in the same place?
Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza?
If our planet is inhabited with creatures made by God...is it possible that there's another planet inhabited with creatures made by the Devil?
If a table is propped up can it be propped down?
If shampoo comes in so many colors, why is the lather on your head always white?
Is an alcoholic just a drunk that's scared of a hangover?
Seeing as cupid is so good at matchmaking, does he have a girlfriend?
If the police see some one committing a crime but are on there way to investigate a crime do they stop or go to the one they were on their way to?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn't they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand?
If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church?
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
If the weather man says "it's a 50% chance of rain" does that mean he has no idea if its going to rain or not?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On our desk we have work stations. GO FIGURE!
If Fedex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP?
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?